To download a PDF of the flier to your computer, click here —> April mediation event flyer
The Law Collaborative Los Angeles is pleased to announce that Ronald Supancic, CFLS is speaking along with Myer Sankary, Esq., at the Mentor project event at Cal State Dominguez Hills on April 23, 2012 from 5-7:00 p.m. in Loker Student Union. It is vital to provide support and mentoring to up and coming peacemakers. Please mark your calendars and plan to attend. We look forward to seeing you there.
I’m going to be speaking in a webinar about the Collaborative Law movement’s application to Civil Litigation for The West LegalEdcenter on March 9, 2012 at 1:00 p.m. Click the link below and sign up- It’s going to be very interesting and I’m excited to be a part of it 
Sign up now for The West LegalEdcenter – Collaborative Law for Civil Litigation
As a California Bar Certified Family Law Specialist, one of my goals is to help clients achieve a successful divorce. It may seem like the words “successful” and “divorce” contradict themselves, but they do not. Experience and academic studies have helped us identify the basic elements of a successful divorce. “Successful,” as used here, means to complete the process of emotional separation, establish a new center of balance as a single person, maintain the welfare of your children, and develop healthy attitudes toward yourself, your ex-spouse, and your past marriage.
As in life itself, absence of conflict is not part of a successful divorce. A degree of anger and conflict is natural, useful, and constructive. It helps break the bonds of attachment and old patterns in the relationship, stimulates reflection, and enables change. (Excessive and destructive conflict, however, requires special treatment – usually the intervention of divorce coaches).
I ask clients to try to view their “ex” as a problem-solving partner. It is helpful to consider the ‘ex’ as someone who can actively and constructively participate in resolving the issues created by the separation. The closer the parties come to mutuality and balance, the healthier it will be for them and their family.
If you would like to attend this Saturday’s free family law workshop, please RSVP by calling toll free (888) 852-9961, or reply to this email. To view other upcoming free events at The Law Collaborative, please visit www.thelawcollaborative.com/events.htm. I encourage you to forward this invitation to your friends, family, and colleagues.
Best wishes for a healthy and happy New Year,
Ron Supancic, CFLS
The Law Collaborative, APC
21051 Warner Center Lane, Suite 100
Woodland Hills, CA 91367
T: (818) 348-6700
F: (818) 348-0961
www.thelawcollaborative.com/
If you have been following along for the last three weeks, you are familiar with Helene Antel’s story. If you haven’t been following along, you should start now. Her story is incredible. A former criminal prosecutor district attorney, a ferocious advocate for her clients, and a victim of domestic violence. Listen to Part 1 here, Part 2 here, and Part 3 here.
This week Helene talks about what she learned from her life experiences and how they changed her attitude about the practice of law. She discovered that being kind, patient, thoughtful, and charming, made her a better, more effective lawyer. In her words:
“The long drawn out expensive divorce litigation is the perpetration of the anger, the fight. It’s that neither party is willing to move on; the fighting is just a way to maintain a connection. If you declare peace, then the relationship is really over. Without knowing it, many people are not ready to truly separate themselves from their partner so they connect through a long drawn out battle. But you can choose not to fight anymore. You can choose to learn how to mediate your conflicts or manage your conflicts and keep the family together.”
Listen now to the fourth and final interview with Helene Antel, lawyer and peacemaker.
Like what you heard? Subscribe to Ron and Robert on Divorce on iTunes and download free podcasts every week.
In last week’s episode of Ron and Robert on Divorce, we heard the story of Helene Antel, a successful, powerful, ferocious district attorney who was the victim of domestic violence. It took her years, but she finally learned how to follow the very advice she routinely gave her clients. Once she learned how to do that, she was able to begin building a life of freedom for herself and her child. When asked what the turning point was that allowed her to start taking her own advice, she says it was when she achieved ambivalence.
Now, she finds herself moving away from litigated court cases because she doesn’t want to make war anymore. She wants to make peace. In her words:
“Violence only breeds violence. Respectful communication breeds solutions. You can get a resolution without all the hate, the fighting and the misery. It takes less time, and it takes a far less egregious toll on the participants.”
Listen now to part 3 of this fascinating series:
Missed the first two? Listen to Part 1 HERE and Part 2 HERE.
Don’t miss another one! Subscribe to Ron and Robert on Divorce on iTunes and download free podcasts weekly.
Former criminal prosecutor Helene Antel grew up in a low-income housing project in the South Bronx. It was a rough and ugly neighborhood where people did not treat each other with kindness. She knew, even as a little girl, that so much hatred was not normal. She remembers being eight or nine and flying with fists of fury at a burly, tattooed gang member because he was picking on a little fat kid. She’s had the heart of an advocate since she was small.
Helene is a lawyer in Alaska who recently made the decision not to litigate any more. Over the course of her impressive career, and with a little help from her personal life, Helene has come to the conclusion that most conflicts are the product of a misunderstanding, or the lack of a good translator. And so she doesn’t litigate, she translates. Through translation, she reduces conflict while increasing peace and understanding.
Listen as Ron and Robert interview Helen Antel, lawyer and peacemaker.
Like what you heard? Subscribe to Ron and Robert on Divorce on iTunes and download free podcasts weekly.
In this sixth and final segment of Ron and Robert’s interview with Virginia’s leading Real Estate Divorce Specialist, the gentlemen discuss the difference between distributive bargaining (which is what you get when you go to court) and collaborative negotiation, which is what happens in a Collaborative Divorce. We like to tell the story of the orange:
Two young siblings are fighting over an orange. Their father walks in on them, takes the orange away, cuts it in half, and hands a half to each. Sister bursts into tears. “Why are you crying?” asks the perplexed father. “You and your brother both wanted the orange, there was only one orange, so I cut it in half. You should be happy.”
“I don’t want half!” sobs Sister. “I only wanted the peel. I need it for a cake I’m baking, but I have to have the whole peel.”
“Oh. Bobby?” He asks Brother, “Will you give your sister the whole peel if she’ll let you have the whole inside?”
Brother’s eyes light up. “Gee, sure! I didn’t want the crummy peel anyway.”
And that, dear friends, is the difference between distributive bargaining and collaborative negotiation.
The gents go into more detail about distributive bargaining, and then they talk about how to divide a property that was owned prior to marriage, what happens if you file bankruptcy during divorce, and whether or not you should keep your house if you file for bankruptcy.
Missed the first five parts of this series? Here’s Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4, and Part 5.
Don’t miss another one! Subscribe to Ron and Robert on Divorce on iTunes and get free podcasts every week.
Maybe you’ve been following along (if you haven’t, start playing catch-up now!) but today’s episode of Ron and Robert on Divorce is crucial. Certified Real Estate Divorce Specialist Randy Morrow delves into the topic of short sales: What is a short sale, do you qualify for one, and what will it do to your credit score? In Randy’s words, “This is mandatory to understand.”
Listen to this new podcast from Ron and Robert on Divorce – you’ll be glad you did.
Missed the first four parts of this series? Find them here, here, here, and here.
Don’t miss another one! Subscribe to Ron and Robert on Divorce on iTunes and get free podcasts every week.
Here are some tips and suggestions to help make the process of divorce a little bit easier. If you follow these suggestions, you will save yourself a lot of potential frustration down the road.
1. Always take your file with you everywhere.
2. Keep a journal. Write down every significant event, conversation, discussion and action of your spouse at the time it occurs.
3. Keep a ledger. Write down every financial aspect of your case to assure a complete, accurate, and legible record of all the financial aspects of your case.
4. Memorialize every agreement with every person who is interested/involved in your case. Keep/send copies.
5. Meet with your attorney in person to design strategies for your case. Explore consensual dispute resolution; confirm everything in writing.
6. Know your strategy; do not deviate without advice and counsel.
7. Participate in the preparation of your case; draft, document, investigate, gather information and pre-interview all witnesses.
8. Let your attorney know when s/he is on track or off.
9. Schedule regular spit and grouse sessions with your attorney. DO NOT let resentments accumulate.
10. Keep your account current at all times and offer security if you fall behind.
Randy Morrow is a Certified Real Estate Divorce Specialist, not a lawyer. He does not give legal advice, but he does offer compelling personal advice: Either get divorced or get married, but do not keep any strings. No financial strings, no real estate strings. Cut them all. Listen to part 4 of this 6-part series to find out exactly what he means when he says “Cut them all.”
Missed the first three parts of this series? Find them here, here, and here.
Don’t miss another one! Subscribe to Ron and Robert on Divorce on iTunes and get free podcasts every week.
